Live INTENSELY in Christ.

"And now, children, stay with Christ. Live deeply in Christ. Then we'll be ready for him when he appears, ready to receive him with open arms, with no cause for red-faced guilt or lame excuses when he arrives." 1 John 2:28


Live deeply in Christ. Live well within Christ. Live to a profound degree in Christ. The substitutes that followed deeply.. are definitions of the word. Other synonyms are greatly, thoroughly, intensely and acutely. Take time to replace 'deeply' each synonymous word.

Live deeply in Christ. Live INTENSELY in Christ. THEN we'll be ready for him when he appears, READY TO RECIEVE.

A few things I love about this (both very basic) is first..when we are living GREATLY and INTENSELY IN CHRIST...are we made qualified to RECIEVE.

Second, I love lovies LOVE LOVE...Where it says THEN WE'LL be ready for him when he appears.

I'm not an english enthusiast. As much as I love to write - I really had to work hard for my A in English. However, I do know WE'LL is a conjuction of WE and WILL. WE...US...MORE than ONE. WE...a BODY. WE...a community.

Because I TRULY believe our faith IS NOT ABOUT US...but also others.

When we live intensely in Christ. We overflow. We sharpen those around us. We make Christ alive to others.

When we live DEEPLY IN CHRIST...THEN WE MAKE OTHERS READY. READY TO RECIEVE...IN A POSITION TO RECIEVE WITHOUT ANY EXCUSE.

So when you are ready to give up. Remember God will - if you let Him - use you to convict others to do business with their maker and be sharpened. We must endure! When we don't, when we chose not to spend even just a few minutes in His Presence, when we choose not to fast and pray, when we place priority on the things we do rather than emphasizing Jesus, we can lose the edge...to be prophetic, to be a relevant hope to those around us...believers or not.

It is not about you - it is about Jesus. And Jesus died for everyone...not just you. Get busy..Get intense...living in Christ.

Satisfied in the Wait

"Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things." Colossians 3:2


"Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them." Daniel 10:12


My prayer everytime before I set my hands to the keyboard - is that Jesus is glorified, people are stirred and God's faithfulnes is recorded. 


Currently on the "physical side" of things...We have heard back from Children's Cup and have began the official paperwork of background checks and such. To make it public..we are going to Africa. Our roles, what parts we'll play or details on when we leave or which of the 3 Care Points we'll be at is still undetermined. (Children's Cup has 3 care points: Zimbabwe, Swaziland, Mozambique). We do know it is a two year commitment. However, (this is news we are sharing) we are sensing very strongly it could be more than just 2 years. We are also sensing that it will be relatively soon when we leave. However, we still need to sell our car and home and both Ben and I joke that it'll probably happen right before we're suppose to leave...


So we wait...


On the "spiritual side" of things...God has been giving us roles to fill here and little fun assignments - that require us to bend and be molded and extremely flexible and faithful....humbling. I have remained faithful to seeking God about blog entries - knowing full well that this documented journey has turned into a regular spiritual read for many of my friends, family and coworkers. I desire not to disappoint the Lord in this. Both Ben and I are continuing to fast and seek the Lord about Africa as well as some other BIG things while were here...


So we wait....


And as I wait..as we wait..as the Lord is calling you to wait....I encourage you to remain satisfied. 


Friday I talked about overflowing. When something overflows...it disrupts. When I wake up at the ungodly hour of three a.m. and I begin to pour water and the formula in a bottle...as Paxton sits on the kitchen floor wailing...and I overflow the bottle...He gets so excited and anxious..HOWEVER...that mess needs to be cleaned. Pax is excited...he gets a few more unexpected ounces...as if he needs it - yet mommy has got a mess to look forward to a bit later when she's a little more awake. 


Overflowing disrupts. When God shows up and overflows - we get stretched - our 'spiritual pants' have to be taken out, we get stretch marks, we get redirected. When God overflows - others are affected. When Ben, Pax and I leave - our mommas are going to be stretched...emotions are going to run over. ..life will be disrupted. 


But what God wants us to know is that even in the waiting He still wants us to experience His Presence, He still wants us to overflow and be satisfied..in Him. 


We know when Christmas is...we love that day..time with family and presents. We wait in anticipation for it...but while we wait...we shop..we satisfy our minds and our time. 


God wants us to know our Dreams and WANTS to fulfill them...BUT while we wait..we got some learning to do..some stretching to happen...BUT we also have some JOY TO BE HAD. 


It then becomes a choice. We can, everyday as we wait, say 'get on with it'...'where are you'...'why you taken up all this time'...'aren't you God'...


OR we can say - I'm satisfied. I'm satisfied, I serve You. A God, who has rescued my soul..and if you do nothing else for me...I am satisfied. 


For those of us truly exposed to the Lord, know it is not His character to keep us stationary. He is a GREAT GOD with GREAT EXPECTATIONS. However...


We must be satisfied in the wait. 


In Daniel 10:12 - an angel or maybe even the Lord showed up to Daniel - He percieved a vision. This angel or the Lord spoke to Daniel. 


"Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them." Daniel 10:12


I love 'set your mind' in this verse. It was a choice by Daniel that eventually....eventually....after some wait....recieved a response. But 'since the first day' till the point in which this being showed up to give Daniel clarity...Daniel 'set his mind'. 


Colossians 3:2 says: "Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things." 


The world says now! The world argues that it has done enough waiting! The world says "immediately satisfy me or I'm gonna move on!"


But God..is not from this world..His ways and knowledge and will is HIGHER. Often HIGHER requires LONGER. 


So when we recieve our reward, our promise - we fully understand the value of it. Because its HIGHER...FAR MORE DIGNIFIED THAN WHAT THE WORLD CAN CONJURE UP FOR US. 


As much as I want more babies RIGHT NOW.. I WANT JESUS MORE. As much as I want to be in Africa serving children and adults...I WANT JESUS MORE. As much as I want my address to read a different country and the thrill of a new culture...I WANT JESUS MORE. 


DO YOU WANT JESUS MORE? Than that thing..that dream...that promise?

Overflowing: The Running Over Kind

I want to first start this off with an answered prayer! Those who have been following me since the beginning of the year know that earlier this month I was instructed to pray for a woman - that she become pregnant and to tell her to her beautiful face that God desired to give her a baby and when she became pregnant that it was the Lord who did it. I then wrote about it a week later..asking you guys to pray for her in my January 7th blog. May I thank you for your prayers, she is pregnant. I didn't skip a beat telling her GOD IS GOOD. Continue to remember my prayer request - that she knows it was from God! Giving HIM credit!

Today - in my imagery of Ephesians 3:20 -"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us..." I imagined a clear glass being filled to the brim...then it begins to overflow on to the table then on to the floor...as I imagined this my heart burst to know this is my God's intentions for His children. All over scripture when looking up the words like 'abundance' and 'over flowing'...it is made clear that God has great intentions - immeasurable intentions - for His children.

Then my imagery continued...the glass becomes filled with rich red juice that overflows on the beautiful white table cloth then slowly drips onto an extremely expensive rug underneath the table...that soaks through on to the light carpet. Then the overflowing has become an inconvenience...

However the color of the liquid - which in our case is blood...the blood of Jesus...doesn't relinquish the fact that God gives us overflowing...He desires for us to pass the brim and to overflow....that we enlarge! This WILL cause inconvenience.... To your life, to your time, it will inconvenience your family, your friends, your relationships, your co-workers...and most of all you.

Like I said yesterday...it is impossible to do life as usual and still LIVE for the cause of Christ?

This power that is at work WITHIN US... If we let it do it's work...will flesh out more than we can ever imagine. It's the LETTING.. The BELIEVING... The WORK that must be fleshed out for us to attain...the more than we can imagine.

I want the immeasurable...for me and for you.

This Spiritual Thing Just Got Real!

So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. For,
"In just a little while,
he who is coming will come
and will not delay." And,
"But my righteous one will live by faith.
And I take no pleasure
in the one who shrinks back." Hebrews 10:35-38

My sanctuary - there's this place I go. To just be by myself. There are people around but it's so very individual. It's my place - no responsibilities - no roles - time stands still.

Gosh darn it! Seriously! There's a woman she's been in often. And every time she comes in I can't stop thinking about her...urged to pray for her. She wears it, this pain. This frustration. I can tell it's her place too. To get alone. Last time I saw her she talked with people near me, that she hadn't seen since apparently high school, she's near my age so I figure at least ten years. She's been married and "tried that out"...I'm assuming she isn't now..

Seriously! This is my place. I don't care...but He does.

Today she came in and walked right past me and I knew For sure God has been trying to talk to her...but she can't hear Him. Its as though I'm in this movie...it's supernatural though. The Holy Spirit inside me takes this sense of authority as she and the demons she's wearing pass by.

Her shoulders are slumped and I hear this hiss. Crazy stupid intense.

I'm instructed. But I don't want to go. This is my place - my solitude and it's hers. I'll take that away from both of us if I move the way You want me to, God.

Jamie I'm taking you to a place where you have to truly know and walk in the fact that it ain't about you. I allowed you to feel her...see her...see them. They have a grip on her. They tell her she is unloved...she is unlovable. That she is forgotten...forgotten by Me. They are lies.

Be her advocate.

Knowing this I move not unwillingly anymore.. This is injustice! How dare the enemy captivate the heart of this woman.

Holy Spirit go before me..

I tell her I'm sorry for interrupting. I proceed to tell her she has been on my mind a lot - which sounded so dumb - but it was the truth...she blurted "why?" but I knew it came from a root of "why would you consider me?...." not a "how dare you"... And I continued to tell her it is important she knows that God has not forgotten her and He wants to give her what she deeply desires..I ask her if she would like me to pray for anything specific in her life and she says her family..she then reaches her hand to eyes to wipe tears from her face - panicked I said I would and walked off...

Why did I leave her! Why didn't I see it through! What is the matter with me! I hopped in my car and just broke. I have to tell her she's loved - she's loveable. God I've messed up. Though He assured me I did fine. But why did I abandon her?

My heart broke for her. How can I be so wrapped up in my little faith that finds me doubting His love for me - when I'm sure of His love for others!?!? I'm such a brat expecting God to show up more rather than finding myself grateful for His salvation in my life..when people are bleeding from the inside out. Jesus exposed himself on a cross so that we would never be exposed to the enemy but to a Truly Loving God.....yet her pain was dripping from her very being! She was exposed to whatever spirit would satisfy or justify her pain for her. How selfish am I! Are we!?

Paul was content - whether imprisoned, shipwrecked, lost at sea, flogged...He did not give up believing the Lord was for Him! His concern was for the Lost and for the Church! (see 2 Corinthians 11:23-28)

It is impossible to do business as usual and be wrecked for the cause of Christ.

God is worthy of brokenness.. That He may prove Himself GREAT. Please find yourself in prayer for those who havent YET - BUT WILL - know the Lord..and pray also for this woman..I so sheepishly left to deal with her pain. That Jesus will show up and prove Himself and make His sacrifice evident. And if you want pray for my stupidity.

Bread of Real Life

"Jesus said to them, "Very truly I tell you, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world." Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty." John 6:32, 33, 35

I love bread. Homemade bread or bread from Zio's with some olive oil or butter....oh gosh.

"If you walk in My statutes and keep My commandments and do them, I will give you rain in due season, and the land shall yield her increase and the trees of the field yield their fruit. And your threshing [time] shall reach to the vintage and the vintage [time] shall reach to the sowing time, and you shall eat your bread to the full and dwell in your land securely." Leviticus 26:3-5

As much as I love bread - I love and deeply desire to be close to the Lord...

There's reasons. I need His salvation. I have to daily get my hands on His mercy. I want His nearness for confidence and favor. Im desperate to live a life that has purpose and breathes life into others.

As much as I love eating - I've developed a love/hate relationship with fasting. That I may feast on the satisfying nature of the Lord.

All day for a few days I keep hearing bread of Life. I'm the bread. Seek first me and all other things will be give to you. Bread.

Bread was a big deal in scripture. Jesus was the bread of life. When Jesus, at the last supper, was sharing who would betray him he used bread to identify the one - Judas Iscariot. (John 13:26). When thousands of people were hungry and following Jesus - He fed them with fish and bread. God gave bread from heaven for the Israelites. When identifying how sin infects the whole church - he used bread and yeast as metaphors.

Bread was huge then. It was the meal! Not the pre-course...but the whole meal. So when Jesus told his followers he was the bread of life - it was a big deal. Huge deal.

Bread. Love the stuff. When I butter bread I take my time - I get every top part of that bread with the butter! When im dipping bread in oil - you better believe i double dip and take my time enjoying it. When were at Zio's we get a minimum of five loaves throughout the meal - even up to the dessert. Praise Jesus. (I have a point)...

I want to open God's Word - take my time and looking at every word with hungry eyes. Being eager to eat it. To devour and be satisfied. I want to love His very word to keep me from sinning and living righteously...faithfully.

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." Psalm 119:11

To have the truth on my lips and in the stomach of my soul to bring prophecy to people who need hope. To be ready to give an answer for the HOPE I have in Him.

Bread. I have a feeling I'm gonna be here for a few days.

I dare you to see His Word as a beautiful necessary nutritious loaf of Bread.

Isaiah's Faithfulness Revived My Soul: I Pray One Day Mine Will Revive Another's

God in His ever present faithfulness - when I inclined my ear - instructed me to read Isaiah 40. And God - as if I'm surprised - gave me fresh words. Although Isaiah 40 has been around for quite a long time - it along with much of Isaiah is new to me because of the perspective I've been reading it from. I've included the entire scripture...and in my fascination of it's timeliness I've highlighted in bold some awesomeness I felt strongly given from God to me. I'm so amazed in my lack of faith God continues to seek me out and positions me for greatness. I'm also amazed and blessed by Isaiah's faithfulness to listen and record God's Words for His people.. And that God in all His knowledge and wonder would keep it alive and give it the ability to breath and resuscitate life long after its written.

"Comfort, comfort my people,
says your God. Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,
and proclaim to her
that her hard service has been completed,
that her sin has been paid for,
that she has received from the Lord's hand
double for all her sins. A voice of one calling:
"In the wilderness prepare
the way for the Lord;
make straight in the desert
a highway for our God. Every valley shall be raised up,
every mountain and hill made low;
the rough ground shall become level,
the rugged places a plain. And the glory of the Lord will be revealed,
and all people will see it together.
For the mouth of the Lord has spoken." A voice says, "Cry out."
And I said, "What shall I cry?"
"All people are like grass,
and all their faithfulness is like the flowers of the field. The grass withers and the flowers fall,
because the breath of the Lord blows on them.
Surely the people are grass. The grass withers and the flowers fall,
but the word of our God endures forever." You who bring good news to Zion,
go up on a high mountain.
You who bring good news to Jerusalem,
lift up your voice with a shout,
lift it up, do not be afraid;
say to the towns of Judah,
"Here is your God!" See, the Sovereign Lord comes with power,
and he rules with a mighty arm.
See, his reward is with him,
and his recompense accompanies him. He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young. Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
or weighed the mountains on the scales
and the hills in a balance? Who can fathom the Spirit of the Lord,
or instruct the Lord as his counselor? Whom did the Lord consult to enlighten him,
and who taught him the right way?
Who was it that taught him knowledge,
or showed him the path of understanding? Surely the nations are like a drop in a bucket;
they are regarded as dust on the scales;
he weighs the islands as though they were fine dust. Lebanon is not sufficient for altar fires,
nor its animals enough for burnt offerings. With whom, then, will you compare God?
To what image will you liken him? As for an idol, a metalworker casts it,
and a goldsmith overlays it with gold
and fashions silver chains for it. A person too poor to present such an offering
selects wood that will not rot;
they look for a skilled worker
to set up an idol that will not topple. Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
Has it not been told you from the beginning?
Have you not understood since the earth was founded? He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,
and its people are like grasshoppers.
He stretches out the heavens like a canopy,
and spreads them out like a tent to live in. He brings princes to naught
and reduces the rulers of this world to nothing. No sooner are they planted,
no sooner are they sown,
no sooner do they take root in the ground,
than he blows on them and they wither,
and a whirlwind sweeps them away like chaff. "To whom will you compare me?
Or who is my equal?" says the Holy One. Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens:
Who created all these?
He who brings out the starry host one by one
and calls forth each of them by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
not one of them is missing. Why do you complain, Jacob?
Why do you say, Israel,
"My way is hidden from the Lord;
my cause is disregarded by my God"? Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint. (Isaiah 40:1-16, 18-31 NIV)

I love that my God considers me and my family (verse 11 - He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young."

I've felt a special sort of grace through this process of release - through this season of preparation and change. So much of me has had to be removed and so much of Him has had to be replaced in just a short amount of time AND so much truth has had to be believed that I knew God has shown me more clear and GENTLE grace. Grace to accept change - to accept the unknown - to accept the truth of His calling. God gave us Pax - not some random act of kindness and even now I believe He is tending to that gift.

Verse 11 means so much to me too because the last week I've wanted to be bundled up in Him. Everyday I'd sit on my couch praying He would swallow me close to Him - as if I desperately needed it.. Because I, infact, do! I still feel like that today - not just to be in His presence but to be able to place my head right near the heart of God. So close I can hear and feel it beating - while my body is nestled under His arms. That's comfort.

Thank God for God! Thank Jesus for mercy! I'm find myself thankful and increasing in faith.

Doubt Deminishes the Prompt Promise

I hesitate to write this entry....as if writing at 9:45pm didn't give it away.

This blog is intended to more or less show God and His faithfulness to flawed people who love Him. And coming out of a week and weekend of hearing God speak to me truths that have begun to sharpen my character as well as severe my pride - I very interestingly found myself today in the wilderness... Of my choosing. As if I had just went from a walk thru the parted red sea to land myself in the wilderness.

Though God is so graciously giving me His manna ..im not biting. Today I took off. Im sorry to the Lord now, and i soak in his unmerited forgiveness..however i find myslef a day wasted. Im gonna be real with you - hormones have played a huge part today (if you know what I mean)...with all of that..I had to make a choice today - though in my husbands opinion came far too late in the day - that I need not doubt that my God will perform...

I have to first believe that the God-I-serve's ways are far higher than my own...

That His intentions are to do good not harm...

But second that there is urgency for the things of the Kingdom of God...

And there lies my frustration.

Then I'm reminded - God's ways are HIGHER.

But then my mind shifts again, there's injustice! Wake up God! There's babies who need love, children who need food, kids, teens and women who need justice, women who need direction, Men who need convicted to rise to the occasion as Fathers and as husbands.

We need to be where were going - what's the hold up!

So whats the wait!

For the love...sell our home God! Sell our car! What's taking you so long???

Can they even sell - they both need serious work which requires some serious money! It's hopeless - it can't be done.


On top of that I'm not sure our marriage can handle overseas missions...shouldn't we have like awesome communication..and be like mega in love and perfect best friends.

And what about our family?

What the heck are all these forms? Missionary insurance?? Who's gonna be administering shots to my baby?

Why's it taking so long?

Why haven't You radically sent some old man to buy our home with cash money for more than we owe - who then says throw in the car for also more than we owe...huh?

And why the financial strain while we wait? Really? We're getting rid of everything and tithing? Where the heck are you!

Where's all the definite answers!?

"And he did not do many miracles there because of their lack of faith." Matthew 13:58

And this is what I believe - this doubt that rises inside of me - that deminishes my faith and my hope in Him - it is keeping the swift from occuring. Not just by its existence but by its root. The root must be removed before this woman can be a fit servant of the Lord. Because these minor things - they aren't out of the reach of the Lord to do. The faith He wants to develop - the hope He requires - is the kind that moves mountains...the kind that releases captives - the kind that raises the dead. The very existence of my doubt removes the very possibility that God can use me sufficiently - it hinders the greatness God can entrust to me and it limits the MIGHTINESS of God.

See, where we are going - where God is taking us - faith to provide from the smallest to greatest - EVERYDAY - will be a qualification.

"To the faithful you show yourself faithful,
to the blameless you show yourself blameless" 2 Samuel 22:26 AND Psalm 18:25

It is my choice to believe He will act. His grace has shown me He is capable. For He has done it before and it's in His character that better lies ahead.

Let this entry stand that God does use crazy hormonal flawed people like me...